im gay
i know
yea but for you.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
