This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
