you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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