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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
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