Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
