she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
