and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
