he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize