I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
wat bout pragnant strippers??
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Randomize