what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
