this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
So many bounce houses so little time
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
