OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Randomize
