guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
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