You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
