This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize