I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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