Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
