carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize