Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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