I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize