i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize