He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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