I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
You pole danced in your parka.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
So much Jack, so little girl.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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