yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
