So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Shame is for Republicans.
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