And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
