I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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