Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
