Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
