I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
