You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize