Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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