don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
