He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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