Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
