He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize