no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
