The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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