I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
one two three fourrrrnication!
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Randomize
