Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
