i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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