I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
4 words: hood of his car
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize