Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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