this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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