STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
