Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I just found a bag of teeth...
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
