plz talk dirty to me
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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