Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Omg I joined a choir last night...
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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