i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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