These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
